I miss u…. the fact that you don’t even think about me…. I thought I will NEVER contact you… why I always give up… every time…. I succumb to my desires… why …
tired of this one-sided affection… Lying to myself.. suppressing the little things that remind me of you.
sometimes I think… I didn’t even know anything about you… Nothing… you were a fantasy that became a reality.. and now this reality is eating me up like a termite…
As lucky as I feel to have got some moments with you, I also feel like somewhere it rendered me drained. To want somethings. Should I thank god for giving me this moment or should I curse myself for enjoying my illusionary image of you, trying to run behind things which were never mine. How I wish I got the chance to tell you ever how suffocated I feel when your accessibility seems impossible.
How many times I cry myself to sleep wishing that maybe someday you will be there beside me and I can lie on your shoulder and get wrapped in your arms, how surreal would that be. How many times I have dreamt about us and was hankering for a life with you.
Even though it is impossible to achieve, Why am I not able to make myself believe that the path I am walking on shall lead me to utter destruction and I will spend the whole lifetime picking up the delicate pieces of my love.
all I have for now is a lot of complains. I never really wanted you, but since you came near and gave me the taste of love, I can somehow not stop wanting for more.
If you were never supposed to be a part of my life, then why did god send you to me. It is better to not have something than to have something and lose it.
Despite all this I still miss you a lot.
NO.. it is not just another story, NO it is not drowned in the sea of prevalence, but it rose like the morning sun, so beautiful and full of warmth that you can feel the heat seep in every bit of your flesh. feel the fervor, the chasteness, the immaculacy of a lucid story delicately woven by the thread of passion.
THERE was a girl, pretty ordinary and simplistic. She used to live in a city which was away from the hustle and bustle. She was like a flightless bird who had wings but could not fly. Bestowed with beauty and grace the girl carried herself with dignity. Life was not a joyride for her, she had her own share of vicissitude and treachery and still managed to survive, rather live with an ever smiling face. Life was moving at its own pace entrapped in the quotidian humdrum.
One fine day someone entered her life. A guy from a metro city. The polished, refined and well-versed guy. he was not the perfect prince charming but there was a surreal beauty in his imperfection which appealed to each and every senses of the girl. He was charismatic and had the power to inspire. He was free, gallant and audacious. His sense of freedom made the girl tremor. they started talking, sharing and exploring. Together they reached fantasma and bliss in knowing each other. It was an inexplicable feeling. He gave her some of the most memorable lines that she could possibly gaze on for hours. They were poles apart just like fire and ice, they were near yet so far. they knew each other’s depths but still were strangers. And that’s where the old rules that govern predicaments such as this came in; the opposites attract made much more sense now. The guy was rock hard and had a shield around him. For the world he was someone different but for her he was like a pleasing zephyr… so gentle and sensitive.. She made an effort to see beyond the presented cuticle. It was a roller coaster ride from heaven to hell and the best part being the bond shared was so pious; serene; and pure that it didn’t require a name and perhaps a destination………
why everything feels damaged.
Why constantly weeping eyes leave you empty and lifeless.
Why there is darkness so dense that you see no light.
Why the misery drowns you in a lethal abyss.
Why is there no hope.
Why does the life become an eternal void.
Why is failure so defined.
Why do we lose even before the battle starts.
Why the thorns of life make us bleed so profusely and leave us lifeless.
Why the dark thunderous clouds cover the sky.
Why the storm never subsides.
Why is there no sunshine. . . .. . .
It was a bright sunny day,
The sun was about to leave his way.
step by step I walk in search of you,
But oh my bad.! couldn’t find you.
The jittery eyes got paranoid.
But finally, they got respite, seeing you walk through the aisle
each step felt like a long mile.
the rising heartbeats and the perennial smile,
you walk towards me making the time stop for a while.
the wind too was singing a melodious jingle,
perhaps celebrating our beatific mingle.
Those moments lingered around us like a pleasing zephyr,
Making us feel so sublime.
It empties you like a ghoul has suck all life and the only thing left is the few lifeless pieces and you spend the rest of the time joining them in a hope that one day you will complete the puzzle with the only few pieces you have.
It is the labyrinthine emotions that haunt you; render you sleepless; make you feel numb to the sensation of spring after enduring fall for the eternity.
it was all you have and you gave it to the undeserved or perhaps you thought that the sky and sea can meet but you forgot that the horizon is a sham.
You played with fire in a hope to brighten your world. But it rendered it charred and dingy.
You gambled your heart- the most priced possession in a game where victory was implausible.
You loved and craved for the stars despite of knowing that few things can only be admired from a distance; if you go near, it can leave you smashed.
It is the umpteen number of times you tried to move on; you tried to run away with all the strength you have but a cryptic force pulls you back to the abyss and you; you feel hapless.
Sleep perhaps becomes your best friend and dreams your soulmate. Because that is where you see the two incongruous ends meeting.
WHY DIDN’T YOU STOP ME?
WHEN EVERY BIT OF ME WAS YELLING
WHEN ALL I EVER WANTED WAS OUR OWN JOCUND DWELLING.
WHY DID YOU LEAVE?
WHEN MY OWN BREATH WAS PUSHING THE LIFE OUT OF MY SOUL;
AND YOU LEFT ME ALONE WITH A GHOUL.